Harrumph File #008 3.22.2010_Where did that dang sock monkey come from?

You’ve all seen him on TV...you’ve all wondered the same thing I have.  I’m sure you’re all asking yourself the very same question I have pondered. Where did that dang sock monkey in the KIA ad come from????  Yes, you know him & his friends; Muno, that one-eyed freak; Mr. X (what is that hairy thing, and why a derby?); a wind-up robot (no doubt looking forward to his role in the coming robot revolution!) and a teddy bear. What?  One day they’re just chillin’ in the toy closet and the next they decide to jack the family car and…road trip!!!! They come across some snow, what do they do? Snow angels…yep, snow angels and hanging out with hot chicks in a hot tub (doesn’t that get a bit…soggy for a teddy bear?)  Who are these guys???  Heck, they hit Vegas like a tornado!!!  They act like they own the town!!!  You know, I don’t think they even care if what happened in Vegas stayed there (Hmmm, the new “Rat Pack?”)  Dang, what attitude! And who gets to go to the bowling alley with super-destructo bowling balls???  These guys go in there and don’t just knock down the pins…they destroy them…and don’t even care what anyone thinks about it.  They’re there to have a good time and if you don’t like it, too damn bad. Where do these guys come from??? I dunno, might just be the latest in a long list of evil Chinese plots???  Let’s review: a weird, one-eyed RED monster; a wind-up robot who we already know is plotting with his kind; a teddy bear (or maybe a panda bear in disguise;) a sock monkey, probably from the jungles of the Yunnan province and a strange, hairy creature wearing a derby… hmmm…I’ll let you decide.  And what’s up with the theme music??  Jeeze, every guy out there ever since “Shaft” hit the big screen wishes he had his own theme music.  I mean, come on,  “Who's the black private dick that's a sex machine to all the chicks?  SHAFT!  Ya damn right!”  How can you NOT be cool with theme music playing everywhere you go??? I don’t get theme music…sock monkey gets theme music… where’s the justice???   And that “tat” the sock monkey has sewn on??  I mean, we’re talking old school tattoo here like you’d see on a Marine or a construction worker, not some “tramp stamp” you’d find in a trailer park. One word…“cool.”  Ok, maybe they’re not an evil plot by the evil Chinese.  Maybe they’re not outlaws of society.  Maybe they deserve their own theme music.  Maybe you don’t even care where they came from…but don’t you wish you were that sock monkey? Harrumph…