Poll #29 "Scariest pirate ever" poll ends.

     Yaaaarrr… I see ye have taken yer vote on the scariest pirate ever there was, and I be here again to tell the tale of the results.  Once again, my name is of no consequence, just another poor wretch, scratchin’ to find two coins to rub t’gether.

     I see ye have only givin’ Blackbeard one vote, and right ye would be, for he be no scarier than a kitten in a bag.  And, Cap’n Jack Sparrow?  Well, methinks the only vote he’s got was probably the one he cast himself… a freak he be fer sure.  Somali ‘skinnies” got them two votes and ay, they be pretty scary… especially if yer foreign policy is run by a “community organizer.”  What do we do ‘bout ‘em? Organize a protest?  Finally, we comes to the winner of this here poll.  Barak Hussein Obama, the greatest pirate of all time.  Not only has he bankrupted yer empire, but he lives in yer wallet, taxin’ every last gold piece ye might have.

     And, lookin’ at his poll numbers ye may have finally realized the truth of rule 11 of the pirate’s code as set forth: “That Crew that elects for Captain a Community Organizer or a Socialist shall suffer the consequences of their poor decision.  And That which elects one who be both shall suffer for double.”  Yaaaarrr… it might be time for them which are smart rats to be abandonin’ the ship ‘o state which be run by a Cap’n ready to be voted out by a wiser crew.  (*muffled voice from off-page*… “Mr. Vice President, it’s time to leave…”)  Yaaaarrr… pay no attention to the voice ye may hear… spirits they be… (*muffled voice from off-page*… “Mr. Vice President, really, we must leave now if we’re to make your next appointment…”)  Yaaaarrr… I be tellin’ the tale… *sound of teleprompter falling over and breaking*  (*muffled voice from off-page*… “Mr. Vice President, are you ok?)  Yaaarrr… I be an unnamed wretch… do not listen to the voices, they be… *sound of someone tripping, “Gerald Ford-style” and falling hard to the stage* (*muffled voice from off-page*… “Control, this is team one… ‘Teddy Bear’ has tripped and hit his head again… we’re on the move.”)