There’s one
phrase in the English language that is sure to bring fear, trepidation, panic,
and nightmares to every parent who hears it.
Yes, you know it and I know it, and every parent out there dreads
hearing it from their children: “Mom, dad… the carnival’s in town!” You may remember saying it to your parents
yourself when you were just a wee tike many moons ago. You didn’t know it then, but you surely know
now what a fine line you walked between this world & the next as you
entered that big top.
You see,
children just remember fun things like popcorn, cotton candy, elephants
trumpeting, trapeze artists, and fun houses where they can look at themselves
in mirrors stretched out one way or another.
You, as a parent, see the other things.
You see behind the scenes. You
see the hidden side of the carnival; the dark side; the evil side. You see the clowns for what they truly
are. You see the carnies, chain smoking
“camels” into an early grave. You
recognize that that elephant in the center ring is not just a happy creature
bringing joy to crowds of spectators but is actually a time bomb waiting… plotting…
for the perfect moment to explode into a human-crushing rampage.
That’s right,
what I’m saying is that carnivals and circus’s are devices of the devil,
peopled with freaks and rejects, feeding off of the innocence of children and
the weakness of parents for their own prosperity. Children don’t understand the danger of lions and clowns. Children trust that snake charmers and
elephant handlers actually know what they’re doing. Excuse me, when was the last time you saw an ad for “elephant
handler school?” Do lion tamers have a
framed certificate on their wall from the “Lion Tamer Academy (a Phoenix
program)?” No, they don’t. And, you know, parents can only hear their
child say “I wanna go to the circus, I wanna go to the circus, I wanna go to
the circus” so many times before they just give up and take them.
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| Clowns & carnies...jeeze! |
And what about
the carnies? Who are these people? We know what they want. They don’t just want our money (which they
do,) they want our children.
Their “I’m gonna run away and join the circus” ad campaign was very
successful in the 60’s & 70’s. They
“target” our children with their yummy popcorn swimming in oily butter (which,
by the way, leaves permanent stains in minivan seat covers,) fried
“anythings-on-a-stick,” cotton candy which miraculously melts in your mouth,
hot dogs literally made of dogs, and the Pièce de résistance, square bricks of pink popcorn… drool….
These people are
evil, make no mistake about it. They
want everyone to “run away” to the circus, this way they can sift the freaks
out for more sideshow attractions and turn the rest of the unfortunate
creatures they capture into… more carnies.
They don’t care about the future of mankind at large. They only care about their
future. They envision a day when
big-top circus tents cover the globe!
They don’t want us to go to Margaritaville, they want us to go to
Carneyville.
Or
perhaps it is more insidious than that.
Perhaps they don’t believe in the future of mankind at all. After all, carnies are barely human as it
is. Remember, it was Armando, circus
owner in “Escape From The Planet Of The Apes” which brought down… errr, which
will bring down human civilization and will lead to the rise of the planet of
the apes back in 1971! A planet where
apes evolved from men? I think
not! I echo George Taylor as he said so
eloquently in the original “Planet Of The Apes” (not the crappy remake,) “Get
your stinking paws off me you damned dirty carney!” Harrumph…
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